An Unseen Voice
“’Who are you…. What do you say about yourself?’ [John the Baptist] said, ‘I am a voice of one crying in the wilderness, “Make straight the way of the Lord”’” (John 1:22-23)
As a freshman coming to Yale last September, I decided to walk more closely with the Lord, because He loved me with an unconditional love. I wanted to love Him back by allowing Him to work in my life.
All the same, I admit it wasn’t easy. I looked at my brothers and sisters in Christ for clues to find my own special gift. I realized each one had a special God-given gift to use in specific things to which He had called them. As for me, I felt like Mark Twain’s Huckleberry Finn, trying out new roles to see which fit…maybe a ringing Gospel soprano, perhaps a relentless organizer, or even a brilliant innovator.
The problem was, none of them fit. I because so frustrated; I despaired; I just didn’t have an impressive gift I could use to serve the Lord and help build up my brothers and sisters. I felt so useless because I was so ordinary—not a single special skill!
My heart cried out, “How can I serve you, Lord? What is my role?”
The Lord patiently began to answer, with Scriptures:
“I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show compassion on whom I will show compassion” (Exodus 33:19). “Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’” (Romans 9:20)
Then He showed me I shouldn’t compare myself to my believing brothers and sisters. When Peter started comparing like that, Jesus stopped him with, “What is that to you? You must follow Me” (John 21:21,22).
He showed me I shouldn’t compare myself to my believing brothers and sisters…. “What is that to you? You must follow Me” (John 21:21,22).
That same verse spoke to me as though He were saying, “Ruth, so what if I made your brothers and sisters the way they are—What is that to you? You follow me! Don’t look to one side, but keep your eyes straight ahead on Me.”
Through these hard words, He lifted me. I stopped seeking the Lord for some special talents to serve Him. It was such a relief to realize He had already equipped me to fulfill His purposes.
I may be ordinary, not outstanding, but I still have the Lord God, my Solid Rock on Whom I can depend. All I need to be is what He wants me to be.
A Bearer of Light
I stopped comparing and I stopped despairing, but I did keep asking Him for my role. He graciously led me to more verses:
“’Who are you…. What do you say about yourself?’ He said, ‘I am a voice of one crying in the wilderness, “Make straight the way of the Lord”’” (John 1:22-23).
“While John performed no sign, yet everything John said about this man (Jesus) was true” (John 10:41).
God did not need John the Baptist to perform great signs but rather valued his faithful testimony. Even without special talents or gifts I felt I could serve God as a bearer of His Light, as a voice speaking His good news. If only He would confirm that He wanted that for me….
Then I went with my Christian singing group to perform at a nursing home. On the way, alone in the back of the van, I prayed, “Lord, Lord, I really want to be your witness. I really want you to use me. God, I don’t know how to break through the superficial ‘Hi, how are you?’ level when we mingle with the folks after the concert. Let me not fear. I do not know what to say. Please show me.”
Confirmation
The concert went very well, and it was time to speak to the residents of the nursing home. I greeted a couple of people before I met an old man named Bill. “Hi, my name is Ruth.”
He tearfully replied, “That was my wife’s name, but she’s dead now.”
I thought, “Oh no! What am I going to say now?” But the Lord helped me, and gave me words of comfort to share with him. What’s more, I was bold to tell Bill about the boundless love of our Lord Jesus, what God did for us, and what He wants to do for us. My last words to him were, “Take heart; trust in the Lord.” Bill started singing the chorus of Trust and Obey. Then I sang along with him:
Trust and obey,
for there’s no other way,
To be happy in Jesus,
but to trust and obey.
As I look back now, I realize the Lord heard my cries all along. He used this time with Bill to speak to my heart, and tell me I am a witness for Him—and I can tell you it is a joy, an honor, and a privilege.
I know I can be a voice for my loving and gentle Savior, despite my inadequacies, because God shows His power through my weakness. I remember these words from a hymn that has always encouraged me:
If you cannot speak like angels,
If you cannot preach like Paul,
You can tell the love of Jesus,
You can say He died for all.
Ruth Ku